Wednesday, August 18, 2010

A Word from Dr. Laura

I just finished reading - well listening -  to the audio book The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. I recently started listening to Dr. Laura's radio show and find it very interesting to hear the caller's stories and her feedback to them. So I thought I would try one of her books. And I really enjoyed it and would highly recommend it to anyone, even the best wife in the world (which Tanner would say I am.)

I loved the stories she shares - it's kinda like reading PEOPLE Magazine - you get the juicy details on other people's relationships, but unlike gossip magazines, she teaches you from the stories and can apply her feedback. Dr. Laura is a full-on Type 3 woman. She is intense, to the point, reactive and edgy. I love to listen to her responses and hear her get all fired up. She is living her Type 3 truth!

The overall idea in this book is that wives have a tendency to become selfish and uncaring for their husbands, disregarding what they want and waiting for their husbands to make them happy - of course to varying degrees. She says that men are simple people and their needs are easily met. You give them what they want (attention, love and respect) and they will make you happy.

I agree with most of her points, I believe it is MY job to make ME happy. Tanner adds to my happiness (adds A LOT), but if I relied on him to make me happy I would be watching everything he did with a scrutinizing eye and probably wouldn't give him a chance. I also believe that man are simple - well, at least my man.

Overall Dr. Laura encourages wives to support, encourage, love, woo and cheer for their husbands. As we show our husbands how proud we are to be their wives (in and out of the bedroom) they just automatically do the same for us! It is a cycle - I give -> you give -> I give -> you give

Now, I have only been married for about 18 months - so I am no longtime pro - but in this short time I have seen the difference. When I serve and show my love to Tanner he does the same for me and vice versa. Really, it's a simple equation.

One story that blew me away was of a woman that had a new baby, felt frumpy, tired and unattractive - so as a result didn't want to be intimate with her husband. Well this went on for four years!!! No nothing! It got to the point where she said she would pay for a prostitute so her husband could get what he wanted. He thought about the deal, and almost did it, but he said the thought of his daughter made him not go through with it. The lady called Dr. Laura told her the story and asked Dr. Laura if she should divorce her husband. Dr. Laura sure made her open her eyes. She said YOU want to end a relationship with a man who wants YOU and not a prostitute?! He should be divorcing you - not the other way around. The lady saw what she was doing and turned it around.

There are all sorts of interesting stories like this. This one is a bit extreme, but stood out in my mind - obviously.

My favorite quote from the book is:

"The bedroom {if you know what I mean...} is the foundation of the marriage and family. Don't underestimate its importance and its power to generate the energy by which every member of the family flourishes."
That's from Chapter 6 "What's Sex."

I hope you check the book out. It is a quick read and very applicable. Let me know if you enjoy it!

I love being a wife! Tanner makes it easy. I love you, sweetie!


  1. i love, love that book!

    looking at your hawaii pictures makes me want to go back so bad! i'm just finishing up my post on it. it's funny that both of our blogs have cabin/hawaii posts in the last month:)

  2. One of my favorite books. A much-needed kick in the butt for me from time to time, every time I reread it.

  3. Hey Anne! I saw that you had a blog from your I just started blog stalking you! I love your blog. And now I know why I like you so much! Its sad that we didn't stay friends after I left Utah State because you are a lot like least as far as interests go and all that. I just started skimming over a little bit about your work and what your mom does and I have to say I am intrigued. It sounds really cool! I am very into (trying to) eat healthy and all things related to hmmm what should I say "natural healing?" I dunno. Anyways I am looking forward to learning more from you. ;) And hopefully hanging out soon! P.S. I enjoyed this post so much I read it out loud to my husband. Hurray for Sex. ha ha.

  4. @Jenny, so glad you are stalking me! I was your on blog just the other day too! ;) And I'm so glad that we are in contact again! Stay in touch and when we get into our new house we will plan a time to get together! :)